“Floowrencee” Mr. Doolittle mumbled.
“Here,” Florence replied. She spotted Adam from across the room, tapping his pencil in one hand and twirling his hair in the other. He’s too beautiful, she thought with a sigh. As Adam cocked his head, and turned to her slowly, Florence felt her heart drop. So she quickly directed her eyes to the board. When she dared to peek at Adam again, he was staring down at his paper with a look of pure boredom. Florence sighed in relief, smiling to herself. If she had been paying more attention, she would have noticed the chuckle from Macy.
“Okay class, I know all of you were paying attention when I was discussing your class project,” Mr. Doolittle said. These words caused the class to suddenly pay attention. “Yes, the project,” Mr. Doolittle continued, “Now, I’m going to put you in partners. Chris and Macy, Brittany and Alison, Maybel and Matt…” I hoped silently that Mr. Doolittle would find it in his heart to pair me with Adam. “Jason and Courtney, Tyler and Katelyn, and…” Mr. Doolittle squinted at his sheet. “It seems we have an uneven number in class. Florence, Adam, and Tristan, I’d let you be a group of three, but that’s against the rules of this assignment. Adam, since you’re new, you can choose your partner, and the leftover can work by themselves.” Florence’s heart skipped a beat. Tristan’s a creepy kid, flamboyant almost, Florence thought, Adam’s seen him in his other classes, he’ll definitely pick me. “Adam, who do you pick?” Mr. Doolittle questioned. “Tristan,” Adam replied, moving his stuff over to his new partner’s desk. “I guess you’re by yourself, Florence,” he grunted.
<><><>
Lunch time was always a frenzy of confusion. Kids walking to and fro, little plastic trays covered in sickly smelling cafeteria food. Viewing the room, she instantly spotted Adam. He was being swarmed by Courtney and Maybel, who were practically fighting over him. Florence sighed, and sat in her usual seat by the window, in between the pop machine and the garbage. It was two minutes later when Witsy showed up. “Hi.” She replied. Her nose started running, and she wiped her nose on her sleeve. Florence was Witsy’s back up friend, and she’d been stuck with Witsy since Pre-k when Jenna Flynn pushed her into the mud, scarring her with the name of Poo-poo-pants. Florence figured that one of these days, soon, everyone would realize how great she was, and Witsy could be forgotten. “Hi.” Florence replied, her gaze shifting to Maybel’s cheerful face. “That should be me!” Florence grumbled. “What?” Witsy said, sniffling in.
Florence decided to trust Witsy. “Adam Jameson,” Florence sighed happily, pointing over to his table. Witsy’s face had a confused expression. “Adam, isn’t he that new gay kid that just moved here from San Francisco?” Florence spat out, “Why would you make fun of the new kid like that? I bet he hasn’t even talked to you!” “Well no, I haven’t talked to him,” Witsy mumbled, sniffling a little, “but he was talking to Jacob Carson during math, and some of the things they said made my allergies act up a little extra, you know. Plus, I thought it was obvious.” “Witsy, you just want him to yourself. Well, I’m not falling for that little trick,” Florence spat out.
Angrily, Florence stood up, and tossed her trash in the garbage can beside her. “Where are you going?” Witsy asked. “I’m gonna prove to you he isn’t gay! Why would Adam be gay?” Florence stammered. She marched right towards Adam’s table, and set herself down. Courtney and Maybel instantly looked up, and Adam blinked in reply. “Hello, Adam.” Florence said. She shifted uncomfortably beneath the heavy gaze of the trio. “Uh…hi.” He replied. “How are you?” Florence batted her eyelashes flirtatiously. “Uhmm…good,” His voice sounded like a question. Florence pressed her hand to his shoulder, smiling brightly. “That’s good.” She whispered. “Are you alright? Is there something in your eye?” He asked. The other two girls snickered, covering their giggles. “I’m fine. I am.” Florence said, flicking back her hair. She did it again, and the crack of her neck could be heard. “Did you throw out your neck?” Adam said. He didn’t seemed concerned, just forced respect. Florence sighed, and sat back down beside Witsy. “Gay?” She questioned. “No. He pretty much loves me.”
Sunday, November 21, 2010
The Tale of Maureen Smith
Maureen sat down alone at her own lunch table, reserved especially for her. No one else at Chester high school would bother to even look at her, much less sit with her. Maureen sighed and picked at the so-called food at her table. It looked like mashed potatoes but smelled like chicken, so what was it? "It looks like your face Maureen," a voice said. But by the time Maureen looked up the voice was gone, along with her dignity.
Maureen sighed and started picking at her food again. She was able to figure out it was meat, but was unsure of what kind it was. She stabbed it with her fork and picked part of it up. Then someone tapped her shoulder. Being careful of not getting mortified again, Maureen put the meat back down on her plate and looked around. A boy with large ears was looking at her. He had short brown hair and smelled funny.
Maureen had seen him once before in the hall. He was a geeky boy, who was in all of the advanced classes. He had been hall monitor several times. This was the infamous Eric Taple. Maureen stood up before Eric could say a thing and fled from the lunchroom. Once outside the warm spring air streamed around like soft lace. Maureen sat beneath her favorite tree, that she'd so gladly named Eda.
"Oh Eda, what am I going to do?" Maureen asked the tree. The only answer the tree gave was a leaf falling out and landing on her head. She looked to the school doors. Suddenly they opened and Eric ran out with his trombone and a red rose in his hand. He went over to Maureen and smashed the red rose into her hand. He took deep breaths because he was running for so long, and then pulled out his trombone.
Maureen sighed tirelessly. "I don't what your sudden interest in me is about, but I really don't know whether or not I like this at all!" she said in anger. "Maureen!" a female voice called out. Maureen spun around and spotted Dot. Dot had long brown hair the fell in ringlets down her face. She had a sprinkle of freckles across her face, and pale skin. Dot was semi-popular but would always be Maureen's friend, which Maureen never understood.
Come on Maureen, lunch is almost ever! You don’t want to be late for class, do you?” Dot had an obvious look of annoyance on her face. "Don't go with her, Maur!" Eric fought back. "Maur?" asked Maureen and Dot in unison. "Let's skip school, Maureen! I want to live on the edge!" Eric shouted. He grabbed her hand and started tugging her. Maureen broke free and slapped Eric across the face.
She spun on the end of her heel, and walked with Dot at her side to the door. "Since when are you Maur?" Dot asked Maureen in confusion. "I don't know. He keeps stalking me or something. But enough of that, how are you and Tom doing?" Maureen replied. Dot's cheeks flushed red. "Good." Dot said. A crowd of over-excited kids ran by. "Gotta go Maur, or Maureen! Bye!" Dot was dragged away in the crowd before Maureen could say goodbye too. Maureen stared longingly at the kids and walked solemnly back indoors and towards her locker.
She gathered her things and headed to her classroom. She sat down in her usual spot in the second row near the windows and did her usual sigh. She heard the crowd of kids come in behind her back, she was always the first in class. "Hey Maureen, your face is ugly!" said one of the popular girls, Pattie, to be exact. Pattie was very pretty, with pale blonde hair and big blue eyes. "I'm not the one with rabbit teeth," Maureen shot back. Pattie's only flaw was the huge gap between her two front teeth. She did resemble a rabbit.
Pattie frowned deeply and turned nearly as pale as the hair that sat upon her head. Pattie smiled evilly and sat across the room. Maureen knew she'd hate saying such things to her later. Like last year, Maureen had called Pattie a beaver, and of course she'd been publicly humiliated. Not that she wasn't every day, with names like pimple-face, too-tall, and Bigfoot. Yes, Bigfoot was her usually name, her shoe size was a twelve and a half. The door opened and Mrs. Bumber walked in.
Mrs. Bumber had medium colored brown hair that she spun up in a beehive. She wore rectangle glasses and smiled too much. "Okay, class is started!" Mrs. Bumber yelled. "Today we are studying parts from the election. Now class, tell me, why did John McCain lose?" A couple hands shot up. "Yes, Olivia?" "Because he's old and his running mate was Sarah Palin, and she's really stupid." "Be nice about Sarah!" Mrs. Bumber shot back. "Yeah," said Pattie, "Be nice to Sarah- be mean to Bigfoot Maureen!" The class started laughing- even Mrs. Bumber. "It's so true," she said in between laughs, "Maureen's feet are huge!"
"If my feet are so huge, then why don't I just shove them up all your asses?" Maureen challenged. She kicked down her chair and dumped her papers onto the floor. Maureen stomped out of the room and ran down the hall. She could hear Mrs. Bumber follow her out of the room, yelling something about how America can fix this and she can fix America. But Maureen ran all the way out of the hall. Maureen's vision blurred as tears got in the way. She closed her eyes to keep them in. She was tired of crying, and tired of being treated so poorly. it just wasn't worth it. Not anymore.
She was still in the hallway when Eric approached her. "Can I see your pass?" he asked, as if she never did anything to him. "Go screw yourself," Maureen shot back. "I need to see your pass," Eric repeated. "Go kill yourself Eric. No one wants you here. You're a nobody and a loser, and you will never have a girlfriend or get married or have kids. You will die alone anyway. Why get in everybody's way with your life?" Maureen's voice cracked on the last word. She ran out of the school. She ran past Eda. She ran across the street and through the next block. She was tired, but kept running anyway. Finally, after she was a few blocks away, Maureen was at an abandoned house. She sat by the side of the house's shed and looked around.
It was her new home. Her only company was a small rat terrier who lived inside the shed. The dog she'd named Misty, even though she hated that dog. Well, is it possible to say she hated and loved it all at once? What else was there to love? Misty curled up into Maureen's lap and licked Maureen's face. “You’re the only one.” Maureen whispered to the dog. The dog only stared at her with big sad eyes. “You’re the only one in this entire world who is ever happy to see me. The only one." Maureen sobbed, trying to swipe away her tears. The dog jumped to its feet and ran into the shed.
The next day, Maureen walked a block away and stole a newspaper from one of the recycling bins. On the front page, in big letters, read "GIRL GONE MISSING." There was a large picture of her accompanying the headline. Maureen knew this would happen eventually, so she just flipped to another page. Another article caught her eye: "High Schooler found dead." Next to it was a picture of Eric Taple. Maureen could barely read through her tears. Eric killed himself, all because she told him to. She looked again at the article.
Maureen suddenly became cautious- she was in public, people could very likely find her. Maureen crumpled the article into her pocket. She would read it, but much later. She took a turn down Maple Street past her old house. Where her mother and older brother Tucker were probably worrying where Maureen was. Maureen's mother was what many in the town called a worrywart. She was always wondering where her two children where, always! But Maureen's mother had always been pretty and never made fun of, unlike herself. Maureen stopped at the shed. High Schooler, Eric Taple was found dead in the boys’ bathroom at Chester High School yesterday at 3:30. Authorities tell us that it was a definite suicide. Eric, only 15 years of age hung himself with loads of toilet paper in the last stall. Parents of Eric Taple, Alice and Mark Taple wonder why their son killed himself. "He was a happy boy. Very popular, really handsome, a ladies man." Mr. Taple says. I'm Hera Hernadez and you just read The Scoop!
But in the next article, Joe Bloejobb, a columnist/gossip blogger, had a different take on it. Maureen Smith, the girl who went missing, probably forced him to do it. She seems like a total bee-yatch! I heard she ran out of the classroom after threatening to kill everyone! Then she probably ran into Eric in the hall, pulled a gun or knife or something on him, and made him kill himself, then she ran away and made it look like suicide. It was all her fault. Maureen, if you're reading this, YOU SUCK!!!! THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT!!!!!! DON'T DENY IT, IT'S TRUE BEE-YATCH!!!!!! ~Joe Bloejobb
Maureen gasped and set the paper aside. She leaned against the shed and stared at the sky. "I killed Eric Taple." Maureen told herself. Well, she couldn't technically say that, could she? She told the idiot to kill himself, but she never suspected he'd do it. No one ever listened to her. Maureen didn't know how long she sat there at the shed until the sun had begun to make its way across the sky. "I've got to hide." Maureen told herself. She picked up Misty and walked past the shed. Just a few feet off stood the ten-foot high woods that must have went on for miles and miles. Now she would be safe. Safe from prying eyes.
"Here Spanky!" a voice called. A voice far away. Maureen ran and hid, but Misty responded. She ran towards the voice. "Spanky, I thought I'd never see you again!" It was Misty's owner. Maureen was officially all on her own. She went into the shed and stayed there, doing nothing, for the rest of the day. Eventually she fell asleep.
When Maureen woke up the next day, there was a paper at the house. Apparently the mail was still delivered there. She read the newspaper- "NEW EVIDENCE FOUND IN THE SMITH AND TAPLE CASE."
As many have know long known, Eric Taple committed suicide. But someone thinks otherwise. Here an exclusive interview with Joe Bloejobb:
Hera Hernadez: Hello Mr. Bloejobb! It's an honor for you to be here with us.
Joe Bloejobb: It's an honor to be here Hera!
Hera Hermadez: So what do you think of the Taple-Smith Case?
Bloejobb: I think that this 'Maureen Smith' has a lot to do with this. Just yesterday after Maureen went missing, this young girl named Pattie told me a lot of this Maureen.. Maureen is violent! She has been teasing young Pattie all year long and it's just so cold of this girl. Maureen killed Taple and that's just that!
Hera: So we have Pattie here with us! Hello Pattie, nice to be here with us.
Pattie: Very nice! Maureen hated me! She threatened to kill us all before she just suddenly left.
Hera: That must've been so hard for you!
Pattie: It was. I was always insecure about the gap in my front teeth, and Maureen always rubbed it in my face! She called me "rabbit teeth" "and "beaver." It hurts. I can't believe she went as far as to kill someone. It just makes me weep for the sake of humanity that so many people have problems, but don't get help. I will not rest until Maureen Smith is captured and punished to the extent of the law!
Hera: Did you have any ties to Eric?
Pattie: Eric was my best friend. We always looked out for each other when Maureen teased us. Eric actually had a little crush on Maureen, but she rejected him violently. It was so mean. We were thisclose.
Hera: And now we have Dot Rhone, Maureen's friend.
Dot: Don't call me her friend. She said she was tired of Eric stalking her, and she seemed really crazy and invaded in my life too much. She probably did kill Eric.
Hera: Oh, that's too bad. So Mr. Bloejobb, is that enough proof that Maureen Smith hung and murdered Eric?
Bloejobb: No, police are going to do some fingerprint tests and snoop around the last stall and find any fingerprints on Eric.
Hera: And news update: The great oak tree at Chester high was pulled down just today due to termites and unsafe conditions. I'm Hera Hernadez and this is The Scoop!
Maureen's eyes filled with tears. She was going to Jail. She'd slapped Eric, her fingerprints were on his face, and Eda. Eda had been cut down due to termites. Since when did that great tree get termites? Maureen cried for hours, as she sat in the shed alone, as she always had been.
The next morning, Maureen received the paper again. "FINGERPRINTING TEST PROVES SMITH GUILTY." Maureen shuddered and turned to Bloejobb's column, where she was really gonna get it. So that Maureen chick was proven guilty. Good. That crazy bee-yatch needs years away from the real world. How did she think she could get away with this? Now there's an official search for her going on. I'll end my commentary here and give you the info that Pattie and Dot gave me: Maureen is 5"7' with shoulder length medium-brown hair and bangs. She has tan skin, medium sized brown eyes, a small nose with a slight hook, chapped lips, a slight butt-chin, and blackheads and red dots scattered all over her face. She wears unmatching clothes. The biggest factor that sets her apart is her size 12 1/2 feet. She also tends to talk to trees. If you see an girl with pimples and big feet and is talking to a tree, please call the police and turn her in.
The sun shown through the leaves as Maureen finally left the safety and shelter of the shed. It seemed bright and uneasy, like a whole new world. It was almost as if she'd slept ten years and was frozen forever in the body of a fifteen year old. Her legs ached and her head hurt, but that was the least of her millions of issues. She had to get away, but how could she? Maureen took off down the street and down the road. She began to get tired, but she had to keep going. In case someone found her. She wouldn't be caught, not today. "I didn't kill him! I didn't kill him!" Maureen whispered as she ran. Her breath became ragged and tired sounding but she kept going, deep until she was out of town. She hid on the edge of town, gasping and waiting for her breath to return to normal.
Maureen's breath returned and she fell asleep. When she woke up the next morning, she remembered she had her phone. She pulled it out, flipped it up, and turned it on. She went on the internet browser news. In big letters, it read "MAUREEN SMITH FOUND." Maureen looked around. She'd been caught. She glanced back over to the headline and pressed "read on." Maureen Smith, the killer of Eric Taple, was found last night at 4:37 AM in Dakotaville. Maureen, who claimed her name was Susan, was put into police custody. The suspect, or Maureen, denied everything and released the following statement: "Why are you arresting me? Who is Eric Taple? My name is not Maureen, it's Susan Bradley. Hey- just because I have large feet and an acne problem doesn't mean I'm some Maureen chick! Shut up you stupid police pig. I don't need this. I'm innocent!" Maureen is going to trial this Sunday.
Maureen nearly threw her phone in anger and quickly stuffed it into her pocket. Didn't these idiots understand anything? Someone else was being punished for something stupid old Eric did? What an idiot! Maureen cursed beneath her breath. Taple? Why are you such a dumbass? Why did you actually go out and kill yourself? But somewhere inside her, a voice seemed to say "He loved you, and you rejected him." Maureen almost felt sorry for Eric, but it's easy to feel sorry for the dead. All you had left from the dead was memories, just frozen times in the past, no future. There was only one solution. Maureen called 911. "I'm Maureen Smith- the REAL Maureen Smith."
The cops came and took her away to the jail into the identification room. Her mother and brother were there. Maureen stood next to Susan but didn't glance her way. "Which one is it?" the cop asked Maureen's mom. "The one on the right," said Maureen's mom. Maureen was standing on the left. "You're a horrible mother!" yelled Maureen. She looked at Susan. Susan looked more like Maureen than Maureen did.
She looked well groomed, but with many pimples. But Maureen- she was dirty. She was covered in dirt from the shed and falling asleep outside. Susan looked as if she'd never left the house. wearing an orange sweater, green jeans, one blue shoe, and one gray shoe. One of her legs was longer than the other, but they looked entirely alike. "What's wrong with you? You freak! You copier!" Maureen said. She slapped Susan once and then again. "cClm down!" the cop yelled. "Maybe I know something you don't." Susan said. Her eyes had the same look Maureen had seen once before on her own face, that know-it-all expression. "Well, maybe, you can just tell me?" Maureen said. "We're twins. What else could have made us look exactly the same? What else?" Susan pointed out. "When's your birthday?" Maureen whispered, almost so silent that Susan could hardly hear. "February 16th." Susan said. "Twins? We're actually twins." Maureen said. The word sounded weird coming from her own tongue.
Suddenly Susan fainted. Maureen went down to the ground and took her pulse. Susan was dead. Maureen knocked some of her teeth out- Susan choked on them and died. "I just killed my own twin," Maureen realized out loud. "She admits it! You're going to jail!" A cop was behind her. Maureen was brought to trial and found guilty of the deaths of Eric and Susan.
The end!
Maureen sighed and started picking at her food again. She was able to figure out it was meat, but was unsure of what kind it was. She stabbed it with her fork and picked part of it up. Then someone tapped her shoulder. Being careful of not getting mortified again, Maureen put the meat back down on her plate and looked around. A boy with large ears was looking at her. He had short brown hair and smelled funny.
Maureen had seen him once before in the hall. He was a geeky boy, who was in all of the advanced classes. He had been hall monitor several times. This was the infamous Eric Taple. Maureen stood up before Eric could say a thing and fled from the lunchroom. Once outside the warm spring air streamed around like soft lace. Maureen sat beneath her favorite tree, that she'd so gladly named Eda.
"Oh Eda, what am I going to do?" Maureen asked the tree. The only answer the tree gave was a leaf falling out and landing on her head. She looked to the school doors. Suddenly they opened and Eric ran out with his trombone and a red rose in his hand. He went over to Maureen and smashed the red rose into her hand. He took deep breaths because he was running for so long, and then pulled out his trombone.
Maureen sighed tirelessly. "I don't what your sudden interest in me is about, but I really don't know whether or not I like this at all!" she said in anger. "Maureen!" a female voice called out. Maureen spun around and spotted Dot. Dot had long brown hair the fell in ringlets down her face. She had a sprinkle of freckles across her face, and pale skin. Dot was semi-popular but would always be Maureen's friend, which Maureen never understood.
Come on Maureen, lunch is almost ever! You don’t want to be late for class, do you?” Dot had an obvious look of annoyance on her face. "Don't go with her, Maur!" Eric fought back. "Maur?" asked Maureen and Dot in unison. "Let's skip school, Maureen! I want to live on the edge!" Eric shouted. He grabbed her hand and started tugging her. Maureen broke free and slapped Eric across the face.
She spun on the end of her heel, and walked with Dot at her side to the door. "Since when are you Maur?" Dot asked Maureen in confusion. "I don't know. He keeps stalking me or something. But enough of that, how are you and Tom doing?" Maureen replied. Dot's cheeks flushed red. "Good." Dot said. A crowd of over-excited kids ran by. "Gotta go Maur, or Maureen! Bye!" Dot was dragged away in the crowd before Maureen could say goodbye too. Maureen stared longingly at the kids and walked solemnly back indoors and towards her locker.
She gathered her things and headed to her classroom. She sat down in her usual spot in the second row near the windows and did her usual sigh. She heard the crowd of kids come in behind her back, she was always the first in class. "Hey Maureen, your face is ugly!" said one of the popular girls, Pattie, to be exact. Pattie was very pretty, with pale blonde hair and big blue eyes. "I'm not the one with rabbit teeth," Maureen shot back. Pattie's only flaw was the huge gap between her two front teeth. She did resemble a rabbit.
Pattie frowned deeply and turned nearly as pale as the hair that sat upon her head. Pattie smiled evilly and sat across the room. Maureen knew she'd hate saying such things to her later. Like last year, Maureen had called Pattie a beaver, and of course she'd been publicly humiliated. Not that she wasn't every day, with names like pimple-face, too-tall, and Bigfoot. Yes, Bigfoot was her usually name, her shoe size was a twelve and a half. The door opened and Mrs. Bumber walked in.
Mrs. Bumber had medium colored brown hair that she spun up in a beehive. She wore rectangle glasses and smiled too much. "Okay, class is started!" Mrs. Bumber yelled. "Today we are studying parts from the election. Now class, tell me, why did John McCain lose?" A couple hands shot up. "Yes, Olivia?" "Because he's old and his running mate was Sarah Palin, and she's really stupid." "Be nice about Sarah!" Mrs. Bumber shot back. "Yeah," said Pattie, "Be nice to Sarah- be mean to Bigfoot Maureen!" The class started laughing- even Mrs. Bumber. "It's so true," she said in between laughs, "Maureen's feet are huge!"
"If my feet are so huge, then why don't I just shove them up all your asses?" Maureen challenged. She kicked down her chair and dumped her papers onto the floor. Maureen stomped out of the room and ran down the hall. She could hear Mrs. Bumber follow her out of the room, yelling something about how America can fix this and she can fix America. But Maureen ran all the way out of the hall. Maureen's vision blurred as tears got in the way. She closed her eyes to keep them in. She was tired of crying, and tired of being treated so poorly. it just wasn't worth it. Not anymore.
She was still in the hallway when Eric approached her. "Can I see your pass?" he asked, as if she never did anything to him. "Go screw yourself," Maureen shot back. "I need to see your pass," Eric repeated. "Go kill yourself Eric. No one wants you here. You're a nobody and a loser, and you will never have a girlfriend or get married or have kids. You will die alone anyway. Why get in everybody's way with your life?" Maureen's voice cracked on the last word. She ran out of the school. She ran past Eda. She ran across the street and through the next block. She was tired, but kept running anyway. Finally, after she was a few blocks away, Maureen was at an abandoned house. She sat by the side of the house's shed and looked around.
It was her new home. Her only company was a small rat terrier who lived inside the shed. The dog she'd named Misty, even though she hated that dog. Well, is it possible to say she hated and loved it all at once? What else was there to love? Misty curled up into Maureen's lap and licked Maureen's face. “You’re the only one.” Maureen whispered to the dog. The dog only stared at her with big sad eyes. “You’re the only one in this entire world who is ever happy to see me. The only one." Maureen sobbed, trying to swipe away her tears. The dog jumped to its feet and ran into the shed.
The next day, Maureen walked a block away and stole a newspaper from one of the recycling bins. On the front page, in big letters, read "GIRL GONE MISSING." There was a large picture of her accompanying the headline. Maureen knew this would happen eventually, so she just flipped to another page. Another article caught her eye: "High Schooler found dead." Next to it was a picture of Eric Taple. Maureen could barely read through her tears. Eric killed himself, all because she told him to. She looked again at the article.
Maureen suddenly became cautious- she was in public, people could very likely find her. Maureen crumpled the article into her pocket. She would read it, but much later. She took a turn down Maple Street past her old house. Where her mother and older brother Tucker were probably worrying where Maureen was. Maureen's mother was what many in the town called a worrywart. She was always wondering where her two children where, always! But Maureen's mother had always been pretty and never made fun of, unlike herself. Maureen stopped at the shed. High Schooler, Eric Taple was found dead in the boys’ bathroom at Chester High School yesterday at 3:30. Authorities tell us that it was a definite suicide. Eric, only 15 years of age hung himself with loads of toilet paper in the last stall. Parents of Eric Taple, Alice and Mark Taple wonder why their son killed himself. "He was a happy boy. Very popular, really handsome, a ladies man." Mr. Taple says. I'm Hera Hernadez and you just read The Scoop!
But in the next article, Joe Bloejobb, a columnist/gossip blogger, had a different take on it. Maureen Smith, the girl who went missing, probably forced him to do it. She seems like a total bee-yatch! I heard she ran out of the classroom after threatening to kill everyone! Then she probably ran into Eric in the hall, pulled a gun or knife or something on him, and made him kill himself, then she ran away and made it look like suicide. It was all her fault. Maureen, if you're reading this, YOU SUCK!!!! THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT!!!!!! DON'T DENY IT, IT'S TRUE BEE-YATCH!!!!!! ~Joe Bloejobb
Maureen gasped and set the paper aside. She leaned against the shed and stared at the sky. "I killed Eric Taple." Maureen told herself. Well, she couldn't technically say that, could she? She told the idiot to kill himself, but she never suspected he'd do it. No one ever listened to her. Maureen didn't know how long she sat there at the shed until the sun had begun to make its way across the sky. "I've got to hide." Maureen told herself. She picked up Misty and walked past the shed. Just a few feet off stood the ten-foot high woods that must have went on for miles and miles. Now she would be safe. Safe from prying eyes.
"Here Spanky!" a voice called. A voice far away. Maureen ran and hid, but Misty responded. She ran towards the voice. "Spanky, I thought I'd never see you again!" It was Misty's owner. Maureen was officially all on her own. She went into the shed and stayed there, doing nothing, for the rest of the day. Eventually she fell asleep.
When Maureen woke up the next day, there was a paper at the house. Apparently the mail was still delivered there. She read the newspaper- "NEW EVIDENCE FOUND IN THE SMITH AND TAPLE CASE."
As many have know long known, Eric Taple committed suicide. But someone thinks otherwise. Here an exclusive interview with Joe Bloejobb:
Hera Hernadez: Hello Mr. Bloejobb! It's an honor for you to be here with us.
Joe Bloejobb: It's an honor to be here Hera!
Hera Hermadez: So what do you think of the Taple-Smith Case?
Bloejobb: I think that this 'Maureen Smith' has a lot to do with this. Just yesterday after Maureen went missing, this young girl named Pattie told me a lot of this Maureen.. Maureen is violent! She has been teasing young Pattie all year long and it's just so cold of this girl. Maureen killed Taple and that's just that!
Hera: So we have Pattie here with us! Hello Pattie, nice to be here with us.
Pattie: Very nice! Maureen hated me! She threatened to kill us all before she just suddenly left.
Hera: That must've been so hard for you!
Pattie: It was. I was always insecure about the gap in my front teeth, and Maureen always rubbed it in my face! She called me "rabbit teeth" "and "beaver." It hurts. I can't believe she went as far as to kill someone. It just makes me weep for the sake of humanity that so many people have problems, but don't get help. I will not rest until Maureen Smith is captured and punished to the extent of the law!
Hera: Did you have any ties to Eric?
Pattie: Eric was my best friend. We always looked out for each other when Maureen teased us. Eric actually had a little crush on Maureen, but she rejected him violently. It was so mean. We were thisclose.
Hera: And now we have Dot Rhone, Maureen's friend.
Dot: Don't call me her friend. She said she was tired of Eric stalking her, and she seemed really crazy and invaded in my life too much. She probably did kill Eric.
Hera: Oh, that's too bad. So Mr. Bloejobb, is that enough proof that Maureen Smith hung and murdered Eric?
Bloejobb: No, police are going to do some fingerprint tests and snoop around the last stall and find any fingerprints on Eric.
Hera: And news update: The great oak tree at Chester high was pulled down just today due to termites and unsafe conditions. I'm Hera Hernadez and this is The Scoop!
Maureen's eyes filled with tears. She was going to Jail. She'd slapped Eric, her fingerprints were on his face, and Eda. Eda had been cut down due to termites. Since when did that great tree get termites? Maureen cried for hours, as she sat in the shed alone, as she always had been.
The next morning, Maureen received the paper again. "FINGERPRINTING TEST PROVES SMITH GUILTY." Maureen shuddered and turned to Bloejobb's column, where she was really gonna get it. So that Maureen chick was proven guilty. Good. That crazy bee-yatch needs years away from the real world. How did she think she could get away with this? Now there's an official search for her going on. I'll end my commentary here and give you the info that Pattie and Dot gave me: Maureen is 5"7' with shoulder length medium-brown hair and bangs. She has tan skin, medium sized brown eyes, a small nose with a slight hook, chapped lips, a slight butt-chin, and blackheads and red dots scattered all over her face. She wears unmatching clothes. The biggest factor that sets her apart is her size 12 1/2 feet. She also tends to talk to trees. If you see an girl with pimples and big feet and is talking to a tree, please call the police and turn her in.
The sun shown through the leaves as Maureen finally left the safety and shelter of the shed. It seemed bright and uneasy, like a whole new world. It was almost as if she'd slept ten years and was frozen forever in the body of a fifteen year old. Her legs ached and her head hurt, but that was the least of her millions of issues. She had to get away, but how could she? Maureen took off down the street and down the road. She began to get tired, but she had to keep going. In case someone found her. She wouldn't be caught, not today. "I didn't kill him! I didn't kill him!" Maureen whispered as she ran. Her breath became ragged and tired sounding but she kept going, deep until she was out of town. She hid on the edge of town, gasping and waiting for her breath to return to normal.
Maureen's breath returned and she fell asleep. When she woke up the next morning, she remembered she had her phone. She pulled it out, flipped it up, and turned it on. She went on the internet browser news. In big letters, it read "MAUREEN SMITH FOUND." Maureen looked around. She'd been caught. She glanced back over to the headline and pressed "read on." Maureen Smith, the killer of Eric Taple, was found last night at 4:37 AM in Dakotaville. Maureen, who claimed her name was Susan, was put into police custody. The suspect, or Maureen, denied everything and released the following statement: "Why are you arresting me? Who is Eric Taple? My name is not Maureen, it's Susan Bradley. Hey- just because I have large feet and an acne problem doesn't mean I'm some Maureen chick! Shut up you stupid police pig. I don't need this. I'm innocent!" Maureen is going to trial this Sunday.
Maureen nearly threw her phone in anger and quickly stuffed it into her pocket. Didn't these idiots understand anything? Someone else was being punished for something stupid old Eric did? What an idiot! Maureen cursed beneath her breath. Taple? Why are you such a dumbass? Why did you actually go out and kill yourself? But somewhere inside her, a voice seemed to say "He loved you, and you rejected him." Maureen almost felt sorry for Eric, but it's easy to feel sorry for the dead. All you had left from the dead was memories, just frozen times in the past, no future. There was only one solution. Maureen called 911. "I'm Maureen Smith- the REAL Maureen Smith."
The cops came and took her away to the jail into the identification room. Her mother and brother were there. Maureen stood next to Susan but didn't glance her way. "Which one is it?" the cop asked Maureen's mom. "The one on the right," said Maureen's mom. Maureen was standing on the left. "You're a horrible mother!" yelled Maureen. She looked at Susan. Susan looked more like Maureen than Maureen did.
She looked well groomed, but with many pimples. But Maureen- she was dirty. She was covered in dirt from the shed and falling asleep outside. Susan looked as if she'd never left the house. wearing an orange sweater, green jeans, one blue shoe, and one gray shoe. One of her legs was longer than the other, but they looked entirely alike. "What's wrong with you? You freak! You copier!" Maureen said. She slapped Susan once and then again. "cClm down!" the cop yelled. "Maybe I know something you don't." Susan said. Her eyes had the same look Maureen had seen once before on her own face, that know-it-all expression. "Well, maybe, you can just tell me?" Maureen said. "We're twins. What else could have made us look exactly the same? What else?" Susan pointed out. "When's your birthday?" Maureen whispered, almost so silent that Susan could hardly hear. "February 16th." Susan said. "Twins? We're actually twins." Maureen said. The word sounded weird coming from her own tongue.
Suddenly Susan fainted. Maureen went down to the ground and took her pulse. Susan was dead. Maureen knocked some of her teeth out- Susan choked on them and died. "I just killed my own twin," Maureen realized out loud. "She admits it! You're going to jail!" A cop was behind her. Maureen was brought to trial and found guilty of the deaths of Eric and Susan.
The end!
WTFland:Chapter 1
It all started last night. It was midnight, but I couldn't get to sleep. I was laying in my bed, staring at the stars. Such a beautiful sight. I began to count them- 38 stars in the sky. Just as I was beginning to admire the bright crescent moon, a thought occured to me- where is my ceiling?
I shot out of my bed and looked up. My ceiling was gone. When did that happen??? I swear it was here when I first came in! I began pacing, when I finally just screamed "WHERE THE HELL IS MY CEILING????"
Surprisingly, I got multiple responses: "Hey, my ceiling's gone too!", "Where'd it go?", "When the hell did this happen?" I looked out my window and saw that my neighbors were waking up their families and going outside. It was very confusing- where could our ceilings have gone?
Everyone had their own theory on how the ceilings disappeared, but I had a hard time believing any of them. That's when my next door neighbor, Mr. Banks, started pointing the finger at someone else. "YOU DID IT, LOPEZ!" he yelled at Mr. Lopez, who lives a few houses away from me. That's when a large, bright light lit up the sky. Everyone stopped and stared. Something, I don't know what, came down from the light. It looked like a woman, but it's face stuck out a tad bit more, it had bleached blonde hair, and it was dressed in a funky fashion. "I stole all your ceilings," the woman said, "Now I must take one of you." Everyone stood still. That's when she pointed to me and said, "You. Let's go."
I shot out of my bed and looked up. My ceiling was gone. When did that happen??? I swear it was here when I first came in! I began pacing, when I finally just screamed "WHERE THE HELL IS MY CEILING????"
Surprisingly, I got multiple responses: "Hey, my ceiling's gone too!", "Where'd it go?", "When the hell did this happen?" I looked out my window and saw that my neighbors were waking up their families and going outside. It was very confusing- where could our ceilings have gone?
Everyone had their own theory on how the ceilings disappeared, but I had a hard time believing any of them. That's when my next door neighbor, Mr. Banks, started pointing the finger at someone else. "YOU DID IT, LOPEZ!" he yelled at Mr. Lopez, who lives a few houses away from me. That's when a large, bright light lit up the sky. Everyone stopped and stared. Something, I don't know what, came down from the light. It looked like a woman, but it's face stuck out a tad bit more, it had bleached blonde hair, and it was dressed in a funky fashion. "I stole all your ceilings," the woman said, "Now I must take one of you." Everyone stood still. That's when she pointed to me and said, "You. Let's go."
Head Over Heels: Chapter One
Once upon a time, there was a girl named Cassandra, but she was called Florence. She had two beautiful sisters named Jade and Janis. Her sisters got more attention than her since they are clearly more talented. Jade is a genius and will go to medical school someday to become a surgeon. She dissected her first animal at age 3. Janis was working to become a professional singer. Her voice was WAY better than Florence’s, since Janis had so much musical talent. Florence couldn’t sing and was not smart at all.
Florence had, as told earlier, no talent whatsoever. She was the odd one of the three children. Feared among her teachers, avoided by her classmates, Florence hid away most of the long days, sitting beneath the birch trees of the village. Florence had not much of a future paved down the road, she had not much for looks. Actually she was probably the ugliest girl in the village. Her hair was frizzy and unkempt- unruly blonde-brown hair. A really ugly looking blonde-brown. Her eyes looked far too big for her narrow, pale, pasty face. And they were a dark murky blue gray, an ugly gray. And she was much too skinny to the point that she looked like a skeleton with skin. Florence was a hopeless case, and always would be.
One day Florence went to school. She went and sat in the back, as usual, away from everyone. No one ever talked to her. She went to pull out her cell phone to make herself look like she was texting someone, then remembered her parents didn’t love her enough to buy her a phone. Florence sat down until class started. As usual, her teacher mumbled her name during attendance. Her teacher, Mr. Doolittle, hated her. Ever since the first day, he avoided her as much as possible. “Ok, wonderful people and Florence, let’s get to work,” he said this morning. He was always nice to her classmates, but never her.
Mr. Doolittle dropped a stack of papers on Florence’s desk. “Make yourself useful and pass the papers out,” he said. “But I did it yesterday,” Florence told him. Mr. Doolittle raised his hands, rolled his eyes and shook his head. “And why would I care?” he asked. Mr. Doolittle pushed past Florence roughly, and turned to the class. “Hello everyone, Macy, Alec!” Mr. Doolittle said. Macy and Alec- they were twins, and Florence’s tormentors. They were the class pets, Mr. Doolittle’s little annoying pets. Almost like a set of golden haired dogs out following their human. “Hello Mr. D.,” they said in unison. Florence hadn’t noticed, but she hadn’t even begun to pass out the papers, just lost in her own thoughts. “Florence? Do pass out the pages before we all graduate,” Mr. Doolittle said.
“Oh, and by the way class, we have a new student! Adam, introduce yourself!” The new kid, Adam, then went to the front of the class. He had shaggy, chestnut brown hair hung right by his eyes. Florence could tell they were emerald green. They glistened in the florescent lights. He then said “Hi, my name is Adam. I’m new” and went back to his seat. Florence couldn’t believe such perfection existed. Adam was the most gorgeous boy she’d ever seen. Her thoughts raced in her head- “We must get married. I think I’m in love with this boy.” Luckily her words didn’t slip out of her mouth. They were safe in her head.
Over the next hour, Florence kept switching her gaze from Mr. Doolittle (not interesting.), back to Adam (very interesting.) The way he blinked sent excited tremors through Florence’s spine, the way he flicked back his hair when it fell over his right eye, everything about him was just marvelous. Once or twice Adam looked back at her blankly, but even that sent Florence’s silly little heart bumping madly. And once or twice of those times Florence smiled flirtatiously. Adam only turned back to Mr. Doolittle, without much interest. Florence sighed contentedly. “I'm in love…” she murmured. But out of the corner of her eye, she could see Macy laugh.
Class soon came to an end. Florence rushed out the door, hoping that Adam was in her next class, math. He was. Unluckily for her, girls swarmed around Adam. “Oh my god Adam!!!!!!! WE MUST BE BFFS!!!!!!!” they all said. Florence could tell that her main competition in winning Adam’s heart would be Courtney, the popular girl. She was blonde and thin, with a beautiful- yet fake- face. Courtney kept looking into Adam’s eyes- Florence’s love’s eyes- but Adam didn’t seem interested. “He must love me back,” Florence thought to herself, “If he’s ignoring Courtney.”
Florence wished, not for the first time in her life, that she had the beauty or the brains of one of her sisters, any one of her sisters. As Adam got up to sharpen his pencil after Mr. Boberton explained this trimester’s unit, Florence got to her feet and followed him. “Hey!” Florence said, excitedly. “Uh, hi,” Adam replied. Florence watched as he pushed his broken pencil into the sharpener’s hole, and began to grind the pencil. “You broke your pencil too?” Florence asked, smiling. “Yeah…” Adam said, expressionless. Florence laughed. Adam only looked at her with confusion, and checked his pencil. He nodded with improvement and began to walk away. But before he could get far, Florence caught his wrist. “By the way Ad, if you don’t mind if I call you that, I’m Cassandra.” Florence said. “Uh....kay.” Adam said, and strode off back to his desk.
Florence couldn’t believe it. The love of her life had just talked to her. This must be a sign that they were meant to be. Adam was now talking to Courtney and her friend Maybel. She could sense the pain in his eyes. Courtney and Maybel were flirting with him nonstop, and he wasn’t making any effort to be flirtatious back. He knew it was because he loved Florence and not Courtney or Maybel. “He likes me back...” Florence said to herself. Again, Macy, who was sitting behind her, started laughing again.
Florence had, as told earlier, no talent whatsoever. She was the odd one of the three children. Feared among her teachers, avoided by her classmates, Florence hid away most of the long days, sitting beneath the birch trees of the village. Florence had not much of a future paved down the road, she had not much for looks. Actually she was probably the ugliest girl in the village. Her hair was frizzy and unkempt- unruly blonde-brown hair. A really ugly looking blonde-brown. Her eyes looked far too big for her narrow, pale, pasty face. And they were a dark murky blue gray, an ugly gray. And she was much too skinny to the point that she looked like a skeleton with skin. Florence was a hopeless case, and always would be.
One day Florence went to school. She went and sat in the back, as usual, away from everyone. No one ever talked to her. She went to pull out her cell phone to make herself look like she was texting someone, then remembered her parents didn’t love her enough to buy her a phone. Florence sat down until class started. As usual, her teacher mumbled her name during attendance. Her teacher, Mr. Doolittle, hated her. Ever since the first day, he avoided her as much as possible. “Ok, wonderful people and Florence, let’s get to work,” he said this morning. He was always nice to her classmates, but never her.
Mr. Doolittle dropped a stack of papers on Florence’s desk. “Make yourself useful and pass the papers out,” he said. “But I did it yesterday,” Florence told him. Mr. Doolittle raised his hands, rolled his eyes and shook his head. “And why would I care?” he asked. Mr. Doolittle pushed past Florence roughly, and turned to the class. “Hello everyone, Macy, Alec!” Mr. Doolittle said. Macy and Alec- they were twins, and Florence’s tormentors. They were the class pets, Mr. Doolittle’s little annoying pets. Almost like a set of golden haired dogs out following their human. “Hello Mr. D.,” they said in unison. Florence hadn’t noticed, but she hadn’t even begun to pass out the papers, just lost in her own thoughts. “Florence? Do pass out the pages before we all graduate,” Mr. Doolittle said.
“Oh, and by the way class, we have a new student! Adam, introduce yourself!” The new kid, Adam, then went to the front of the class. He had shaggy, chestnut brown hair hung right by his eyes. Florence could tell they were emerald green. They glistened in the florescent lights. He then said “Hi, my name is Adam. I’m new” and went back to his seat. Florence couldn’t believe such perfection existed. Adam was the most gorgeous boy she’d ever seen. Her thoughts raced in her head- “We must get married. I think I’m in love with this boy.” Luckily her words didn’t slip out of her mouth. They were safe in her head.
Over the next hour, Florence kept switching her gaze from Mr. Doolittle (not interesting.), back to Adam (very interesting.) The way he blinked sent excited tremors through Florence’s spine, the way he flicked back his hair when it fell over his right eye, everything about him was just marvelous. Once or twice Adam looked back at her blankly, but even that sent Florence’s silly little heart bumping madly. And once or twice of those times Florence smiled flirtatiously. Adam only turned back to Mr. Doolittle, without much interest. Florence sighed contentedly. “I'm in love…” she murmured. But out of the corner of her eye, she could see Macy laugh.
Class soon came to an end. Florence rushed out the door, hoping that Adam was in her next class, math. He was. Unluckily for her, girls swarmed around Adam. “Oh my god Adam!!!!!!! WE MUST BE BFFS!!!!!!!” they all said. Florence could tell that her main competition in winning Adam’s heart would be Courtney, the popular girl. She was blonde and thin, with a beautiful- yet fake- face. Courtney kept looking into Adam’s eyes- Florence’s love’s eyes- but Adam didn’t seem interested. “He must love me back,” Florence thought to herself, “If he’s ignoring Courtney.”
Florence wished, not for the first time in her life, that she had the beauty or the brains of one of her sisters, any one of her sisters. As Adam got up to sharpen his pencil after Mr. Boberton explained this trimester’s unit, Florence got to her feet and followed him. “Hey!” Florence said, excitedly. “Uh, hi,” Adam replied. Florence watched as he pushed his broken pencil into the sharpener’s hole, and began to grind the pencil. “You broke your pencil too?” Florence asked, smiling. “Yeah…” Adam said, expressionless. Florence laughed. Adam only looked at her with confusion, and checked his pencil. He nodded with improvement and began to walk away. But before he could get far, Florence caught his wrist. “By the way Ad, if you don’t mind if I call you that, I’m Cassandra.” Florence said. “Uh....kay.” Adam said, and strode off back to his desk.
Florence couldn’t believe it. The love of her life had just talked to her. This must be a sign that they were meant to be. Adam was now talking to Courtney and her friend Maybel. She could sense the pain in his eyes. Courtney and Maybel were flirting with him nonstop, and he wasn’t making any effort to be flirtatious back. He knew it was because he loved Florence and not Courtney or Maybel. “He likes me back...” Florence said to herself. Again, Macy, who was sitting behind her, started laughing again.
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